Baby J was born last summer and after surviving the initial bouts of sleepless nights and triage mode with everyone else in the house, I decided that this spring and summer would be a fantastic time to focus on me and getting myself back into fighting shape. My childbearing days are over — knocking on every wooden surface I can think of — and now it’s time to get healthy and set a good example for my three kids. So, I did what any normal person would do and joined a gym. Thankfully it’s a month-to-month membership because after a solid first month of vigorous workouts including a Zumba and a spin class, Big sisters A and E bring home colds, which sends Baby J into ear infection mode and therefore me into isolation mode. Since I use my childcare sparingly and as work necessitates, workouts just aren’t fitting the schedule.

So, as I was hoisting my nearly 20-pound baby through Costco today while trying to lift a case of bottled water into my cart I thought, “You know? This is a workout.” Then I thought of all the other things I do on a daily basis and got exhausted thinking about it. So here I present my Real-life Workout or a normal day:

Ab Work Warmup

To begin the day, listen for baby whimpers on baby monitor. Sit up in bed. As baby gets quiet, lay back down slowly working the core. Baby whimpers again. Sit up again. Nope, quiet. Lay back down. Repeat five more times until the whimpering becomes crying. There. Core exercises.

Leg Exercises

Make first trip into girls’ rooms to get them up and dressed for school. Reach up to the top rack of the closet to hang the good clothes that E can’t get into. Stand on tippy toes to stretch calf muscles. All while holding onto 20-pound Baby J. For added stretching, raise Baby J to grab onto hanger on top rack and hold. (Well, you have to hold because he won’t let go). Feel the calves burn!

Next take the tribe downstairs (22 steps assuming nothing or no one is forgotten upstairs) for breakfast. Repeat calf exercises rifling through cereal boxes on top of the fridge to appease the antsy mob. Alternate the calf stretches by bending down to pick up Gerber Puffs that Baby J has tossed to the floor. Your legs should be feeling it by now!

Head back upstairs (22 steps up) to get dressed and grab a load of laundry. Back downstairs with laundry basket. 22 more steps.

Quick Cardio Interval

Quickly pick up the living room toys and vacuum which burns about 50 calories according to fitwatch.com.

Strength and Endurance Training

Take Baby J to Costco. Attempt to carry him in the Ergo. After 10 minutes, wrestle him into the cart. Push said cart and accumulate water bottles, juice boxes and Diet Coke. Now that the cart weighs a ton push to the front of the store. For added difficulty, take baby out of cart and hold him, while pushing the one-ton cart from the back of the store to the front.

Daily Cardio

At both naptimes and bedtimes, take a tired Baby J upstairs (22 steps) to his crib. Place him in his crib and do not make it easy on yourself. Go all the way back downstairs. When he fusses go all the way upstairs to console him (remember, this is cardio advice, not parenting advice) and return back downstairs. Each nap and bedtime should yield three roundtrips up and down the stairs.

Weekly Cardio

By scheduling as many extra curricular activities for the kids as you can on one day you can channel your cardio workouts into a set timeframe. Even from the driver’s seat of your car your heartrate will be elevated as you drive to and fro hustling children in and out of carseats and inside buildings and classrooms and soccer fields. Bonus: The kids get tired too!

Who needs a gym, right?

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